child does not want to staty without me
shrim posted on Sat, 07/23/2011 - 10:39
Hi mothers,
I am looking for sincere advice from you. Both me and my husband has been working for past one year. in fact i took up my job only last year. my son goes to a playschool. he is in nursery. he is now 4 yrs. We had full time maid with us. all of a sudden she had to go to her how town. i asked another maid to come to spend whole day. but my son does not like her. and he wants me to stay at home. he has been crying a lot. It has been more than 15 days. and he has still not adjusted.
Please tell me what can I do to make him happy.
Thank you very much for your time.
shri
At the start let me tell you that I have limited understanding of your situation. But if I were you, I will leave my job and spend time with child. This is the most important time in their shaping up. And they remember these experiences for all their life. I think he was getting emotional support from your other maid. Not all maids will be good at that. But I also understand the trauma that you are going through as mother. I just hope everything works out for you in the end.
shrim, take off for some days and spend those with your child. Have the new maid and let him get adjusted. Sometimes the child may not be comfortable immediately with a new person. You have to give him time. If you ignore your child it may have some wrong impact on your child's brain.
In a years time I am sure your child is used to spending the day without you. And you are saying that you have got some new person to take care. It comes to my mind that your son is not liking the new care taker in some way. You need to monitor the caretaker. For this you may want to stay at home or you might use some device to monitor her.
Hope this helps.
You need to know what your child is missing or suffering from because of which he is crying. If you ignore him at this stage it will have bad effect on him. You do need to spend time with him. I am sure your family comes first for you so why compromise. You can compromise a little at the job front.
I agree with all the other members you need to spend some days with your child. I am sure your child is not getting enough care and affection from your maid. Maybe your earlier maid was better. You need to get your child's confidence back and get another person who will be better adjustable for your child.
Thanks for your suggestions. I am planning to take leave but I am not getting one immediately. Let us see how will I manage. Any other thing that I can do immediately.
If you cannot get a leave immediately you can try and get help from some family member whom your child is close to. Maybe it will give some relief to his emotional concern.
I agree. Mostly kids are close to their grandparents and am sure your child may get back to normal if he gets a chance to spend sometime with his grandparents.
Grandparents they are the ones who give lots of love. Till now I love to spend time with my grandparents. I am sure your child will love the company of his grandparents and he will get back to normal.
It is definitely a good idea to have grandparents around but that is a short term solution. shrim, you being the mom it is very important that you spend time with ypour child and find out what went wrong.